In this post, we’ll unpack all you need to know about the 6 Human Needs in the context of relationships, defining what they are, how to meet them, how to leverage them and more.
6 Human Needs In Relationships
Every single one of us has 6 Human Needs that are fundamental to creating a life filled with happiness and fulfilment. They are:
- Certainty ― The need to feel safe, comfortable and secure, consistently.
- Uncertainty ― The need for the unknown, for surprise and for new stimulation.
- Significance ― The need to feel seen, special and wanted.
- Love ― The need to feel loved and to form bonds with others.
- Growth ― The need to keep developing ourselves mentally, physically and spiritually.
- Contribution ― The need to help and add value to others.
While everyone shares these universal needs, we each meet them in different ways.
How To Meet The 6 Human Needs In Relationships
Below we’ll unpack how to meet each of the 6 Human Needs for both men and women.
- Certainty
For men, a woman needs to feel certain that you will make her feel seen, safe and understood. She needs to know that she can rely on you for emotional support. A woman will test you as a way to gain reassurance that you love her ― this is your chance to prove your masculinity and be her hero.
For women, a man needs to feel certain that you will make him feel trusted, needed and appreciated. He needs to know that he can rely on you to make him feel competent. A man that feels like he is your hero will do anything to make you happy ― he will literally die for you.
- Uncertainty
For men, a woman needs to be romanticised in order to feel love. Surprise your partner with a special date, a bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolates or something else you know that she will especially enjoy and appreciate.
For women, a man needs to be sexually stimulated in order to feel love. Plan a new and exciting sexual scenario. Be unpredictable in how and where you show him your love. Tease and provoke him.
- Significance
We all want someone who makes us feel like we are the only person who matters. For both men and women, think of ways you can make your partner feel special. What can you do or say that will make them feel like the most important person in your life?
- Love
We all have different ways of giving and receiving love. For both men and women, recognise and identify your partners preferred Love Languages so that you can express your love more effectively in ways that truly speaks to their heart.
- Growth
Your relationship is either growing or dying. For both men and women, commit to striving for higher and higher levels of love and passion. By cultivating an environment that encourages growth, you lay the foundations for the relationship to thrive again and again. Have shared goals and propose ways you can support each other’s goals.
- Contribution
The secret to living is giving and giving begins at home. For both men and women, discover ways you can support your partner mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. Then you can begin to look at ways you can contribute to the people and world around you.
How To Leverage The 6 Human Needs In Relationships
The key to leveraging the 6 Human Needs in relationships is by discovering which needs your partner values the most and then identifying ways to meet those needs. Equipped with this information you’ll have all you need to truly fulfil your partner leading to more love and passion in your relationship.
If both partner’s can meet each other’s needs at levels 9 or 10, you will create a truly extraordinary and unbreakable relationship filled love, passion and fulfilment.
Summary
Extraordinary relationships start with discovering and then meeting your partner’s needs.
When you’re able to fulfil your partner’s needs for certainty, uncertainty, significance, love, growth and contribution, you lay the foundations for a lasting intimate partnership filled with love and passion.
