One of the most important skills a woman must master in order to build a successful relationship is not only expressing her wants and needs, but also expressing them in a way that motivates a man to fulfil them.
Men Want To Support Women
A deep-seated desire in men is the desire to feel needed. Their self-esteem stems from their ability to successfully fulfil their partner’s wants and needs. The same way a man’s romantic gestures light up a women by making her feel special, a woman’s requests for support light up a man by making him feel needed. When a woman asks for support, it says to the man: You can be my hero!
If a man fails to support a woman at the level she wants, she may make the mistake of focusing on her negative feelings when making a request. The man interprets her behaviour as she doesn’t trust him to fulfil her needs, making him feel criticised and judged. As a result, he is likely to resist her request until he is appreciated for what he has already provided.
The key for a woman is to create opportunities for a man to successfully fulfil her wants and needs in a way that will motivate him to fulfil them now and then receive his efforts with positive responses of appreciation so he will be motivated to fulfil them in the future.
Master The Art Of Asking For Support
Not only is it important for a woman to explicitly communicate what she wants and needs in a relationship, but also how she communicates it. The way in which a woman makes her requests can be the difference between getting what she wants and needs or not.
When a woman asks for support, her request must contain three things. It must:
- Be made with a positive attitude and free of expectations.
- Be direct by clearly communicating what she wants and needs.
- Clearly communicate that fulfilling her request will make her happy.
When a woman’s request is free of expectations and negative emotions, a man is motivated because it gives him the information he needs without saying that he has failed her in any way. Similarly, when a woman’s request clearly communicates what she wants and needs, is made with a positive attitude and clearly communicates that fulfilling her request will make her happy, a man is motivated because he can then feel confident in fulfilling her.
For example, instead of a woman saying “We never spend time together anymore” she could say: “Let’s plan to spend more time together. I love being with you. Let me know when you have time to go over our calendars.” Hearing that she loves being with him increases the man’s levels of testosterone which will motivate him to fulfil the request.
When a man fulfils a woman’s request ― no matter how small ― it is vital that she expresses her appreciation. This will encourage him to support her again in the future.
In order to successfully motivate a man to fulfil her wants and needs, a woman’s requests must be free of expectations and negative emotions, they must be direct and clearly communicate what she wants and needs, they must be made with a positive attitude and must clearly communicate that fulfilling her request will make her happy.
By mastering how to create opportunities and effectively ask for what she wants and needs, a woman will be equipped with one of the most important skills necessary to get the support she deserves and create a successful relationship.